Melly Was Here

wife, mother, teacher, runner, writer, lover, fighter

Take a Ride on the Boobie Bus!

on May 16, 2013

So, as you all know, I am forty now. So are the boobs. You know what that means! Mammogram. I know that there are all kinds of statistics out there about early detection and a better survival rate. I am too lazy to look them up and cite them here, but I know they are out there. I mean, common sense, right?

I got an email from the Health and Wellness chick at my school. They were going to offer free mammograms at one of the high schools on a mobile mammogram unit. Or, as I like to call it: a boobie bus. They really couldn’t have made it any easier. Which was really cool because I have a tendency to put important stuff off if it requires too much effort. I just had to email and make an appointment. Then, on Friday I left school a little early (thanks to my awesome principal) and jumped on the Boobie Bus.


The Boobie Bus

I checked in and got my disrobing instructions. The nurse made sure to tell me three times to disrobe from the waist up only. I couldn’t help but wonder if she was telling me that because some people have come out naked or if I looked liked the type of person who would come out naked. I was a little flustered from the drive over. Friday traffic can be crazy. There’s a good chance she asked me because she was under the impression I was the type to come out with my butt and other girl parts enjoying the breeze (the bus was air-conditioned).


Here I am in my robe. I would like it noted that I have my pants on.

I got dressed and waited for a few minutes until it was my turn. The technician was really cool. She explained to me what she was going to do and she told me that leaning in was the most important thing to do. The more I leaned in, the better the images she could get and the faster this whole thing would go.

Now, I’m not a shy person so dropping my robe was not difficult for me. I mean, this tech was a woman and honestly, I can’t even imagine how many boobs she’s seen in her career. I couldn’t help but feel a little silly, though. I hate the unknown. I really do. And, I’m not that great of a listener, so listening to directions is hard for me.

She came around behind me and asked me lean it. I was bound and determined to be an EXCELLENT LEANER. Then she lifted my boob and placed it on the machine plate thingy. It was just a little weird having another person lifting the boob. Not many people have touched my boob in my life, let alone lifted it up. Then, she told me to lift my arm up and LEAN IN. I tried my best. The biggest issue was that there was the machine in the way and I had to smush my face against it, with my arm up and my boob between two pieces of glass. All while staying completely still.




My dear friend, Glo, who has been riding the Boobie Bus for a few years now, told me not to look down. She said that it was very disturbing to see your boobie smushed flat like a pancake with a nipple. I didn’t look down. I looked up. I didn’t want to be disturbed.

It hurt, I’m not going to lie. The tech was really fast, but damn. She took some extra images of my left boobie. It was a little sore the next day.

An hour later, they called and said that they want to see me again. They want to look at the left one a little closer. I’m not going to worry yet. Even if there was something there (I don’t feel a lump or anything abnormal) we are catching it early. Early detection is the key. I take comfort in the fact that whatever it is, if it’s anything, I went it and got it checked early. I am proud of myself for that – being on top of it.

If you are thinking you need to go in and get your girls checked, do it. If you have a history of breast cancer in your family or if you’re forty, don’t avoid it because you’re scared. It’s not that big of a deal. It’s fast and so worth it. Because there are people who love you and need you to be around.


6 responses to “Take a Ride on the Boobie Bus!

  1. I can honestly say I’ve never thought of your boobies before. Praying for lefty. May she be “normal.” xoxo

  2. kc3742 says:

    Mammograms are a great preventative tool. Thank you for sharing this Melissa, and reminding women of the importance of screenings.

  3. mary m says:

    Boobie time!

    I’m glad you went and had it done! And needed extra pictures is a regular occurance, especially for younger women since the breast tissue is often more dense, and it can be harder to image the tissue that’s closest to the chest wall.

    I know you fall into the better be safe than sorry category, but I’ll still think happy thoughts and hope that your boobie can handle another set of pictures (now that you know what to expect and all…).

  4. Aunt Jo Ann says:

    Let me tell you this-they have GREATLY improved over the years- also it’s harder on short woman-for me it has always been hard to “lean” in enough because of my height-and the darn machine always hurts my shoulder!

  5. Glo says:

    You made me laugh!! I love your reenactment photo!!!

  6. […] are not that bad.  I did it back when I turned 40.  I took a ride on the Boobie Bus.  Then, I even had to go back to get Lefty […]

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